As we continue our IN DA KLERB WE ALL MONSTERS triple feature, we’re stocking up on silver bullets and garlic pizza to meet an ‘80s take on the Universal Monsters in THE MONSTER SQUAD, starring Andre Gower, Tom Noonan, Duncan Regehr, Ryan Lambert, Jon Gries, Ashley Bank, Leonardo Cimino, Brent Chalem, Robby Kiger, Stephen Macht, Mary Ellen Trainor, Stan Shaw, Lisa Fuller, and Jack Gwillim.
As we continue our IN DA KLERB WE ALL MONSTERS triple feature, we’re stocking up on silver bullets and garlic pizza to meet an ‘80s take on the Universal Monsters in THE MONSTER SQUAD, starring Andre Gower, Tom Noonan, Duncan Regehr, Ryan Lambert, Jon Gries, Ashley Bank, Leonardo Cimino, Brent Chalem, Robby Kiger, Stephen Macht, Mary Ellen Trainor, Stan Shaw, Lisa Fuller, and Jack Gwillim.
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Today we continue our In Da Klerb We All Monsters triple feature with Fred Dekker's monster Mash creature clash. Wolf man's got nards. Drax got a bat. Dork and Twinkies are no match for the local Black Lagoon. As we stock up on garlic pizza and silver bullets to meet an Eddie's take on the Universal Monsters in the Monster Squad. You're listening to how I Met Your Monster.
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A podcast that explores the introductions to your favorite movie monsters. My name is Zack. I'm Danny and I'm Casey, and together we dive into the world of horror to find out how filmmakers have introduced us to our favorite monsters time and time again. This is how I met your most.
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Welcome to how I Met Your Monster, the show where we discuss the introductions to your favorite movie monsters. Today we are continuing our into Claire. We are monsters. I almost said fame. With the Monster Squad classic.
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God, Zack, I love that you have like that. Go to phrase that catchphrase. Every time you watch a classic movie. You always say that. Classic. That's how you know it's good. I feel like I don't want to toot my own horn, but I feel like that would be like a real funny, like, Tim Robinson sketch where he. He could sell something like that, where he would just be, like, classic.
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And it would be like a thing. He's already famous. So anything that any movie that wasn't released like this year is considered a classic. Yeah, yeah, it's technically old. That's so funny. But yeah, we're talking about the Monster Squad today. If you're not already following how I Met Your Monster on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, anywhere you get your podcasts, go ahead and follow us so you don't miss cool episodes like this one.
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And, the rest of our In the Clear, but We All Monsters triple feature. I have to think about that one every time. Or what our monsters but family for horror fans. Exactly, exactly. Either one word. So it's an interchangeable triple feature title. And make sure to follow the show so that you can become part of our fam.
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And then when we're in the club and there's monsters and the rest of the fam, you'll be there too. And they'll all be a fun fucking thing. A monster mash, if you will. A monster mash creature class. This podcast is a lot like, you know, running away to the circus. And when you run away to the circus, you follow some monsters.
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You follow your chosen family. So follow us. Join the circus calling carnies monsters. Oh yeah, you freaks. You're a bunch of freaks. I love watching that movie and siding with, like, the quote unquote normies. The money freaks. Freaks? Yeah, yeah. Just kidding. But also, you guys, I wasn't clear how I Met Your Monster has a Patreon that you can join for free if you want, just to stay up to date on some stuff that we're doing.
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Can I actually say something about the Patreon really quick? Because this is something I didn't know I was telling someone about our Patreon and they, like, stopped me like deer in headlights and they were like, you have a Patreon. And I was like, yeah. And they're like, oh, that's crazy. And then anyways, fast forward the conversation leading to the fact that they assumed Patreon was just for porn and like an OnlyFans.
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So they thought there was like a and a like a porn version of a podcast. I mean, I have not, it gets pretty nasty and technically, is porn really? Yeah, it's a porn adjacent. But, without any visuals. But I thought that was so funny, and it really funny for a loop, because I just, I realized how much of a nerd I am that I only associate patriotic like, movie podcast.
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Well, yeah, it's, you know, as far as I knew, it was all. It was always like, mainly creators, like, I mean, I guess porn, a porn people are creators. Oh, I know Brooke has had one for a long time, you know what I mean? But, yeah, you can join our Patreon. It might be porn. It might not be.
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I don't know, you have to join to find out. You gotta find what somewhat disappointing you. Fuck is.
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Commentary. So we go to predator. I can't jerk after this. What the hell that mean? You can hear about just about anything. Okay. But. Yeah. Patreon.com slash how I Met Your Monster. Join for free or subscribe and get, some cool things like, monthly commentary episodes. So. Yeah. Patreon.com slash how I Met Your Monster. It might be porn.
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That's the slogan that needs to be our slogan. It might be porn. Check out our latest commentary on predator. You know, and then you go see Predator Badlands in fucking theater. Man, I really hope this episode has some even, like, the semblance of a connective threat to predator, but I bet it doesn't. So we'll find out. But I bet it doesn't.
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The episode we're about to do right now. Yeah, the Monster Squad. I don't think it does, but I wish it would, and I bet it doesn't. But we'll see. Fred Decker and Shane Black, it took me a minute to get there. I was just I was like, yeah, we're talking about Monster Squad. What you talking about was like, Gilman is kind of like the predator.
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But like, cannot wait until we start talking about galvanic race is like the predator. Shane Black and Fred Dekker, who created the Monster Squad, are big creative players, you might say, in the world of predator, that the video game they play, the new video games, they're big. And you didn't know that Geronimo del Toro wrote The Hobbit?
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Yeah. No, no I didn't. Yeah. Oh, yeah, all three of the movies. That's crazy. A week of epiphanies, but no, Shane Black wrote predator and stars in it, and, Fred Dekker wrote and directed The Predator from 2018, I believe. So, yeah, there's a little bit of a connection there, Danny. I get what you're saying.
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But also, guys, this movie came out the same year as predator. Oh, it did 1987. Yeah, yeah. And Shane Black, I think you already just said that was in predator. Then I just said that. What the fuck?
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You're asking for permission to talk. Why did you ask for permission to listen his brand. Is it with him? Kind of looks like Gillman.
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Okay, here's a stupid question. You guys seen this movie before? And if so, did you like it? You girls is. Take it. Okay. I shouldn't be here today. Why? I don't care about this movie. I don't, I've tried, I actually, I grew up, I did watch it growing up, and I liked it fine.
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But then a couple of years ago, I went to rewatch it, and I actually turned it off halfway through. Oof! So then last night, I was like, no, I gotta try it. I don't remember a single thing that happened in this movie. That's a lie. I remember I remember two things about this movie. What do you remember? Let's see what's.
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So. Let's see what stands out. Okay. What's the kid's name? Rodney. You know who the fuck is, right? There's Sean. Eugene, Patrick. Eugene! Boris. Rudy! No, Rudy! Come on. Like Rudy and Rodney are that different? You. It's okay. Rudy. Rudy looks like someone. And I want to see if Danny can guess who it is. Because he looks like a very young version of a RuPaul's Drag Race star.
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Obviously not in drag, but I was going to say it reminds me of what's his name from the movie we'll be doing next in our triple feature and Dream Warriors. I think Joey. Joey, I think of his name. Yeah. Kind of looks like really military. He, Joey Mullet. Joe. I can't think of who Rudy looks like.
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Tina Burner, young Tina burner. They look like distant cousins. Maybe they look like that could be Tina Burner. Son. They have the same hair and the exact same nose. And eyes. That's the squinty little eyes. Squinty little brown eyes. Wow. Not talking about. Oh, I'm just imagining, you know, a burner. And this are all.
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In drag, though, I was going. Where does that look like? Yeah. She doesn't look anything like Rudy anymore. That's hilarious. So. So I remember that from last night. And then also, the scene where the, werewolf is in the in the police station, because that just cracked me up. Cracked you up? It's still one of the most emotional scenes of all time with a great Jan grease performance.
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Yeah, because they were handcuffing him, about to lock him up, and then he starts shooting at them and screaming for them to lock him up. And that's exactly what they were about to do. Oh. I see, I see, but yeah. Do you know who else Jonathan Griese is when he's not playing Wolf Man? You know who he is.
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It's the White Lotus. What? It was Uncle Rico in Napoleon Dynamite. Oh, yeah, that's right. I think that's so funny. And it's such a wild. He also played, werewolf in Fright Night two. Wow. He's one of those actors where when I watched him in The White Lotus, he's, like, such a, I won't spoil anything, but he's an interesting character.
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And I was thinking I was like, oh, wow, what a good actor. Like, I feel like I, I wish I'd seen him in more. I just assumed I didn't really know his career. And then when I was, you know, I've obviously seen the monster quite a million times, and, I had no idea. He plays the Wolf Man.
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So I keep discovering he's one of those actors. Or it's like. And the. Oh, and I had the same thing with Napoleon Dynamite. I was like, oh, shit, that's the guy. So he actually has had this, like, really prolific career. I'm just, yeah. An idiot. I don't think you're an idiot, Danny. You're not thinking, I was fishing for that, but.
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Casey. Okay, the two scenes you remembered. Okay. I thought you were really going to love. It's one hour and 22 minute runtime. Well, I did, but the problem was, I still didn't pay attention for most of it. I thought you would love the creature effects. Yeah. Stan. Winston. Stan. Winston. I don't remember any of them. Yeah. Stan. Winston.
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What do you mean, yeah. Oh, no, I remember, like, when he turned into the wolf guy, the wolf man, and then the pizza guy. So you have to understand what he is, Wolf. I don't want to speak. I don't want to speak for Casey. But she was really, troubled by one of the earlier. Maybe they're all the original wolf man that we did.
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Larry Talbot. Talbot who? Turn it to turned out to be a real creep. And that's before he transformed. So, I can't hold it against it. Casey. Yeah? How come they can't make a creature from the Black Lagoon? You mean Joe, man, like it's his name? Gillman and creature from the Black Lagoon. I've never seen something he really has.
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That's funny. You just watched it recently. They just kind of refer to it as like. All right, so why in this movie? Why was he called Gillman versus. So it's funny you should ask. There were a lot of rights issues when they were they couldn't really replicate the Universal Monsters. So but they use a lot of the names besides.
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Well, I think some of them are like Dracula is based on the novel, right? Wolf man is just like a generic. Yeah. In, in the, he's not like, he's not labeled as, like, he's not in the credits. He's not credited as Wolf Man. He's credited as like Desperate Man or something like that. Oh okay. Yeah.
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Like even even down to the kind of like the design of the creatures. Like they had to make just enough tweaks so that there were any legal ramifications, like even down to, Frankenstein's monster with the bolts not being in his neck, but in his head, the like kind of. It was like these little ways, these little loopholes.
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Sure. So, yeah, I don't know if that answers your question, but yeah, it was a more of a legal thing than a creative thing. I figured I just thought it was funny that they used all the other names. His name is just like Josh the like we couldn't it was really hard to find even anytime we try to do anything creature or gil or fish related, they came after us.
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So we just went for something more generic. Yeah, well, yeah, because, you know, I say he's uncredited or he's not credited as Wolfman in like when they, you know, like that famous kick him in the nose. And then they say, Wolf Man's got nards, they come Wolf Man, and they go, so it's a guy. It's. Yeah, I don't know, but real maybe back, maybe there's like a.
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Oh, sorry. No, no, no. Good. I was gonna say maybe there is like a way to get around red tape. If you're not specifically calling the creature or the character the name, and they're just kind of stating it's a wolf. Man's got nards. Yeah. Not. Look, there is Wolf Man. He has no, you know, I bet there's some way down, man.
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Werewolf there. Wolf. That castle.
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But real quick on still on Gilman. Played by Tom Woodruff Jr. Do you know another connection, with Tom? Well, I know, I know, he did the sculpting and the painting on the creature and Frankenstein's monster. And this was his film debut. Playing anyone, I guess. Do you know any of the creature that he worked on?
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Do you know what he played in his next movie? His follow up movie? Josh, I want to say predator because Josh. Josh, it's predator. Kind of like top of mind. It's a Stan Winston connection. Oh, so okay, so it has to be. He played okay. Yeah. No kidding my love. That's pretty cool. So in that behind the scenes he loves this movie Casey.
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And so in the behind the scenes shot of that that behind the scenes shot of Pumpkinhead where you see like his sneakers, you know, it's like they're filming, that's Tom Woodruff. Junior's sneakers set is so cool. Gillman probably just gets better and better. Yeah, it doesn't have anything to do with the movie, but that's okay. I feel like Pumpkinhead wouldn't exist without it.
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And I guess you know, since we're talking about who plays the monsters. Tom Noonan. Frankenstein. You got to love him. Yeah. Which funny. I mean, I'm not going to be like, it's actually Frankenstein's monster. Frankenstein. Was he? Yeah. They just kind of are like, you know what? We're not going to do. I also think that maybe our generation and I'm speaking for myself, but also collectively for our generation, like you grow up associating the name with the creature because we're not growing up reading Mary Shelley's book.
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Right. Or like watching the fuckin Kenneth Branagh movie, which I, which is in the theater bad, but it's oh, Jesus. Okay, so Zach did I should say I was, I was way too young and I don't, I was too young to be there, but my mom took me anyways. But, like, we grew up like, that's Frankenstein. So, you know, guys, stop is hard on yourselves if you still referred to the creature as or the monster as Frankenstein.
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Frankie. Frankie, like. Yeah. Or just Frank, as they call me. Yeah, Frank. But. Yeah. Tom Noonan. Wow. What? You gotta love him. He really is something else. This he had done. So this was. This is after he did Manhunter. Correct? I think so. So he's already, like, has his toes, is deep in the well of horror.
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Well, I know him. You know, growing up, I know him as one of the main villains in Last Action Hero. Yes, with Arnold Schwarzenegger. He's like the rain raincoat in the acts and. Oh, yeah, that's right. I forgot he wrote that. Look at that. And then, of course, listeners and fans of the pod will know Tom Noonan from, I think our first and only previous Tom Noonan movie, which is House of the devil.
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Yeah, we did a couple years ago. But I do have a, nice, not nice, I don't know, it might be nice, but a fun connective thread here. Tom Noonan, who plays Frankenstein or Frankenstein's monster in this movie, we, henceforth in this episode, I will refer to him as Frankenstein. He played the villain in Last Action Hero, Guillermo del Toro, who just, you know, as the date of this recording released Frankenstein on Netflix yesterday, I heard it him telling a fun story about when he took Cronos to the Cannes Film Festival.
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He went there like, completely broke. Cronos got into the festival, and he went there and he was, kind of like, overwhelmed when he got there by the amount of just like, advertising that the festival does. And he had said that the one thing that he remembered was a giant inflatable Arnold Schwarzenegger. I think it was inflatable, but like a giant last Action Hero standee or poster or something.
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And and he just had his little box of like 100 posters to, like, hang out, like little fires to hang on. But they ended up winning. Cronos ended up winning. And it just like took his career. But, you know, last Action hero Guillermo del Toro, Frankenstein, it all kind of came together. Cronos. So he did all the show?
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Yeah. It was our Christmas movie last year. It is a Christmas movie. And since we're still talking about things on our part that we did, previously, this was a Peter Hyams production who, you might know as the director of End of Days. Hot damn it. Yeah, that was our New Year's Eve movie.
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Yes it was. We take creative liberties because in our one of our halfway to Halloween movies was Flatliners. So.
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Much of a pumpkin. Well, it's we're doing a Christmas movie, so we are, just so you just you wait, as I say, in Hamilton. Zach, you asked, if we had all seen this movie, and I need to answer this question because this was a very formative movie for me, arguably, maybe the formative movie for me when it comes to horror movies.
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We had this taped when I was a kid on a little VHS that we recorded off our TV, just a little. It was a video. So we had hit and there was this one little er, if you, if you went to get them. Yeah. He had many VHS tapes. No, I'm serious about this. I'm not real. Yes.
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They fit. You put them in a large tape. But we had those two. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So they did exist. That's so funny. That's, but we had a tape and it was basically the way we recorded it onto the VHS was a double feature of it had The Goonies and then the Monster Squad fun, and it had it made this.
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Guys, if you can somehow replicate this experience, it makes this movie ten times better. So, Casey, you made this. Maybe you need this. This, this. Somehow you could watch The Goonies and Monster Squad, but I don't like The Goonies either. But specifically it has like that cheap VHS recorded from a TV grain. Sure. And the sound is a little off.
00;19;39;06 - 00;19;58;00
And every time there's a commercial break, it's like. Like it just like cuts for a second and like it, it's like, whoa, what the fuck? It's something. Again, this is pure nostalgia. Speak. No, it's okay. It just makes the memories so much stronger. I had a double feature, the same that was also filmed off of TV. It was Little Giants and Rookie of the year way.
00;19;58;00 - 00;20;17;02
Yeah. Why are you so good at like, our parents are so good at, like theming these. Yeah okay. This is going to be formative for them. Yeah. No I'm sure they were both on TV back to back for some reason. Yes. That's fair. But yeah, Monster Squad was probably the first horror movie I saw. We watched it so much.
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I don't have proof or evidence of this, but my older sister said that my brother and I watched it so many times that we wore the tape out, so we must have just I mean, well, I mean, it was just it was just a little VHS. So it wasn't my view. It didn't work technically. So we watched it one time and then it broke.
00;20;37;19 - 00;20;58;25
But, yeah, this is, really, formative movie. I said that already, but, yeah, really special movie. And, I love it, and I'm really glad that we finally get to watch it, actually, like, Casey, that you are as big of a fan because it gives a little, you know, as little flavor to this conversation because I don't want to just be, like, gushing the whole time.
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Yeah. For Patreon.
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It might be. It might be for.
00;21;06;14 - 00;21;23;06
I love it. Oh my gosh. Yeah, I don't remember. I know I used to watch this a lot as a kid, but I don't remember, like the first time I saw it. I don't know how old I was or anything, but I know I used to watch it a lot, and I recently just showed this to Samuel, who is.
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Well, he's nine, he I think he was probably eight when I showed it to him. And he really liked it. There's a lot of, like, problematic language in it that I was, like, showing it to him. And I was like, oh shit, I forgot. Oh, this thing. Yeah. It's, Yeah, he was, karate the other day before, it was like right before Halloween.
00;21;43;24 - 00;22;02;11
And his instructor asked, like, what are some good Halloween movies that you guys like? And I thought he was going to say Monster Squad. And he's like and raises his hand and he says, is aliens a Halloween movie? And the instructor looked at them like, what the hell? Like, I like, I wanted to, like, melt into my seat.
00;22;02;15 - 00;22;21;12
It's like, it's cool. He's like, it's, I don't think you should be watching, like A nightmare for Christmas. Yeah, like some, like, modern, like, animated special on Disney Plus or some. Yeah. Like, oh come on. But he was like, he was right. He had his hand up and he was like. It's like shaking his hand. He's like, is aliens on Halloween?
00;22;21;15 - 00;22;43;00
That's why I was like, man, you didn't even say, do technically, I guess carve. They like carve people out from the inside. Kind of like a pumpkin. Yeah. That's why he said it. Yeah. He's like, well, actually, if you think about the technicalities of the creature's design of just horror movies in general or just movies, you know. Yeah, yeah.
00;22;43;02 - 00;23;08;07
You guys, before I, before we go into this, you guys know who I met last week and had a long conversation with, Tom Noonan. Guillermo del Toro. Just go down the list of people we just talked, rescued. Probably one of those guys I met and chatted with Shane Black, and it was a, life changing moment.
00;23;08;07 - 00;23;39;16
And I've been wanting to tell you guys, but I wanted to say that because was talking about how I didn't like this movie. Danny. He specifically said he'll never listen to this podcast. Yeah. Danny. Super friendly guy. It was kind of like this thing where I was walking. I was at the listeners for context. I was at the Austin Film Festival, and the kind of main hub of it is in the Omni Hotel in downtown Austin.
00;23;39;19 - 00;23;58;21
And a lot of people are just kind of like wandering around. And I forgot that there are people there like of, you know, kind of renown, I guess. And I'm walking and I'm with a friend of mine and he recognizes someone, yada yada, yada, like a friend of his. And I look over and I'm like, oh my God, that's Shane Black.
00;23;58;21 - 00;24;19;12
He's just like chatting with someone. And I'm like, oh my God. I'm like getting all hot. And I'm like, sure. Like, relax, relax. So my friend who's knows this guy is standing right next to Shane Black and it turns into this thing where we're just kind of like pulled into the circle. But Shane has his back to us and we start talking and little by little, somehow, I don't even know how exactly it happened.
00;24;19;15 - 00;24;39;26
We were talking about projects we've worked on, and Shane kept kind of like looking back, like kind of like, oh, interesting. Curious. And then finally he spins around and he's like, so tell me about what is this, what's this thing you're working on? And I was like, oh my God, I'm pitching a pitching. I'm pitching. I need to okay, cool it, cool it, breathe, breathe, breathe, be really fucking cool.
00;24;39;29 - 00;24;58;19
And I wasn't trying I but I did, and I got to know I got to chat with. He's just a really nice guy. Like, goes out of his way to be really down to earth. Anytime you've seen an interview with him and he has this kind of, like, really down to earth, like even his movies, like it's it's the same kind of, I don't know, vibe, I guess.
00;24;58;22 - 00;25;19;15
And yeah, we just talk. Let me hear over nice and so that makes sense. But yeah, just a really nice guy. And, I've been holding that in my back pocket because I've been really excited to tell you guys, and it didn't feel right to say it over text or not with a camera recording this conversation. But I wanted it on record.
00;25;19;18 - 00;25;38;19
That's awesome. Right. Cool. I was like, what are the odds that we're. And we had been. So listeners, by the way, this triple feature, we've had to like, move things around. So it's kind of, you know, by fate. Yeah. Have per chance that we should be purchasing this right after. Yeah. That's awesome. Listen, Shane, kick out of that.
00;25;38;20 - 00;25;57;01
Shane. Shane my man I've never seen the Lethal Weapon movies, but I bet I was. Casey, what are you doing to me today? I love Iron Man three. It's a lot of fun. I do love, you know, RoboCop. No, I've never seen the third one, but I'm sure I would love it. The nice guys love the nice guys.
00;25;57;03 - 00;26;17;23
Lots of nice guy. That's good. Yeah, lots of fun to have. You've never seen a fucking Lethal Weapon? No. Okay, well, there are some Lethal Weapon similarities in, in monster Squad, which we'll talk about, but. Oh, yeah, there are the. I know of only one, but, Okay. Do you guys want to get into, this movie?
00;26;17;26 - 00;26;37;23
Yeah. Let's. Let's go, let's do it. Let's go meet some monsters. This is like the monster movie. I can do on our show. You guys, I'm so excited. I thought this would be more of a shit show in terms of kind of clocking all the reveals, but it's not bad. It was. Yeah. Yeah, it was pretty straightforward.
00;26;37;23 - 00;27;00;14
It just slow. There's a lot of them, which we'll get into, but, let's head to some undisclosed location and meet these monsters. Yeah, some. Some might even call it Dracula's Castle. I meant, like, the town, but he's getting against Transylvania. We know that. Yeah, I guess we're starting in Transylvania. Let's go. Yeah, we can. We can go there.
00;27;00;16 - 00;27;11;15
You.
00;27;11;17 - 00;27;38;20
Do do little, little. Harry. All right, so here we are in Dracula's castle. Dude, the monster squad, we've got 18 monster reveals, so we've got a lot to get through. We're going to keep it kind of straightforward on this one. We're only going to talk about the monster reveals and nothing else. Okay? No. Nothing else. Just talk.
00;27;38;20 - 00;28;00;24
Just just talk real big like this is that big time. And this is the horror. Yeah. But this was your pick for our in Claire. We are monsters. Also your pick. Did you say in the class I said Der Duck? Yeah. Wait. It's seen in their club. In in that club, in the club, in the club and declare in.
00;28;00;24 - 00;28;22;09
Declare we are monsters. Yeah. You fucking. You are the reason I have to say that. You're welcome. So we're not going to spoil it on this episode. But Zac's next episode is so straightforward. It's like we needed this, so. Oh, yeah. This is the dumbest dribble feature. Dave. I'm sorry. Can you read the synopsis, for the Monster Squad?
00;28;22;12 - 00;28;47;13
Yeah, please. A group of 12 year olds form a Universal Monsters fan club called Monster Squad, an attempt to save their home town from Count Dracula and his fellow monsters. When they show up, you'll a little misleading, because only number one. Like they're not even the Monster Squad until Shawn says they are, and then they have to be like, what's the Monster Squad like?
00;28;47;13 - 00;29;16;09
Yeah, and it's after them. They are monster fans. Yeah, I think they're more of Monster Club. Yeah. Which is a monster. Monster clear like we're about. Yeah, there are clear. But first there, Sam, and then there are club. Yeah. And then there are squid squirt. The Marines discovered, and spilled my coffee. Yeah, it. You can't in the movie teaches us this.
00;29;16;09 - 00;29;42;26
You can't officially, graduate from, Claire to squirt until actual monsters present themselves physically. Right? So. Fun fact. Yeah, and there's more, I would argue. Really fun fact. It's a great. It's also like, I don't know, there's like maybe three of them or 12. There's also more characters that are not 12. Yeah. One is there's a, there's a fight.
00;29;42;27 - 00;30;09;00
Eugene is there's like someone's like lost child. Yeah, there's a dog. There's a scary German guy who's like 80. What the fuck? Anyways. But go ahead, I IMDb just keep it to 12 year olds. That's. Yeah. It is. Is Trump in charge of, I seem to be no. Oh. Like what? Shouldn't say, a group of kids or something.
00;30;09;00 - 00;30;23;11
I don't know, I don't know. I don't write the earth. I just, I just sort of break them down and tell them where they went wrong. Okay? I'm trying to find. I can't remember what the. Are you listening? As I IMDb.
00;30;23;14 - 00;30;59;01
That's telling you where you went wrong? Yeah. Patrick's sister. What? What is Danny rambling about? I don't know who. Who's the girl from the movie with the. All right, so we've established that there's a squad, but maybe we should venture off onto our first location. Yeah. Let's go. Official monster I do love. I just want to point out the opening text that scrolls on the screen as it, as the movie starts, which just sets the tone for the whole kind of movie.
00;30;59;01 - 00;31;20;17
Yeah. Says 100 years before this story begins, it was a time of darkness in Transylvania, a time when Doctor Abraham Van Helsing and a small band of freedom fighters conspired to rid the world of vampires and monsters, and to save mankind from the forces of eternal evil. They blew it. Okay, I am going to some fun later.
00;31;20;17 - 00;31;42;14
We are going to kind of. When we start getting more into the story and the characters, I forgot that they're called freedom fighters. There's an argument to be made that all, if not most of the human characters in this movie are, I put this lightly. MAGA, like the MAGA cult, the all the all the human characters are manga in this.
00;31;42;16 - 00;32;01;04
Yeah. I'm interested to hear, like, how you got there. I didn't yeah I and and that was before I did that time considered. No but it the mentality is shared and I should I don't know are we should I be broader in that. Well I'm confused because I didn't I didn't we'll get there. We'll get I didn't get much of anything.
00;32;01;06 - 00;32;20;24
I mean, other than like, we'll get there hunting people that are different than you. Like, I get that, but that's part of it. But there's some monsters, though. They're trying. They're literally monsters trying to destroy the town and kill people. Yeah. It's not like I promise. It's not like they're just gay people, but they're like, get out of here.
00;32;20;24 - 00;32;40;19
Hey, no, all the monsters are gay. Yeah, but there's still monsters. Just living in his being gay doesn't make monsters. That's my dream. Yeah, like you can be gay and not a monster, but you can also be a monster and be gay. But you're still a monster. Yeah, right. Yeah, yeah. So it doesn't matter if I get someone.
00;32;40;20 - 00;32;57;14
If I said that. Right. You know what I'm trying to say? I know that yet. No. Well, I promise we'll unpack it more. And by that, I had, like, one extra thing to say. Will, in talk about he says one thing. Okay, so our first reveal is right during the opening credits. This is the main that I would say.
00;32;57;15 - 00;33;18;10
Well, I mean, he is the main, monster in this movie. You could say it and it would be true. He's Dracula. He's Dracula. Yeah. You get like, the cool coffins in the spiders and the thing, and then he. Yeah. Can we talk? Like talking about reveals? What a reveal. Yeah. You get the great, like, coffin opening with the spiders and then his hand and fingers coming out looking like spiders.
00;33;18;12 - 00;33;38;24
That is. And, I like how the his. You know, you see him as like a bat and then his hand, kind of like, he's like winged fingers. It's like his wings. Your wings. His wings kind of shrink a little bit. Makes you swing her. He makes. He makes. Do you think is his winger? Does it, does that too.
00;33;38;25 - 00;34;03;11
Does it stretch? So it needs to be. I would also can you picture a, a bat with a human dog? Well, that's the thing. No, it shrinks when he becomes a human. So it's actually bigger. Like, so it's just a giant like bat with a huge dick? No. But I love his journey in this where he people are invading.
00;34;03;12 - 00;34;21;23
He has a whole plan to kind of, to let evil spread and yada yada. He crawls out of the coffin, turns into a bat, and then promptly turns back into a human, like, just to have, like, an entrance.
00;34;21;26 - 00;34;43;00
Theatrical. He is gay, but he's just like, it's all about the entrance at the entrance. I knew I could relate with these monsters. Like, he crawls out, and then he, like, notices that there's cameras there. He's like, oh, shit. He's like, wait, wait, I can do it better, but I do. But in all seriousness, the effects are they're great.
00;34;43;00 - 00;35;06;06
And they're also, like, I love the like the economy, the like the economic approach to it, where it's it's simple trick photography, but kind of also paired with actual like in-camera effects, or practical effects, I should say with like the you were talking about the wingers or the wingers, what you call wingers. I said wingers, it's wing fingers.
00;35;06;06 - 00;35;34;24
And you said, well, here's which is like a wing penis lings. Wing bang. Oh. So yeah, pretty pretty great way to open a movie. Yeah. Especially for a character that we're also familiar with. Sure, sure, though. And my lawyer says, not the same character from the original 1931, Dracula, from Universal Studios. I mean, with how he acts, there are a lot of differences, that's for sure.
00;35;34;24 - 00;35;54;14
Yeah, yeah, I'm not a fan. You're not a fan. Oh, you made me. You know, you said you didn't like the movie, so I would assume. You know, it's not that I don't like the movie. Oh, it might be worse. I don't care about the movie. Oh, I'm in different. I'm indifferent. I mean, this is worse. I don't dislike it, but I don't love it, you know what I mean?
00;35;54;14 - 00;36;11;21
I'm not, like, upset about it, but I just think his character, he's, like, not mysterious in this at all. He's just like a thinks he's badass. I don't know, I like mysterious Dracula, you know? Well, yeah, it's like this movie isn't really like, you know, you got to get to know the character of Dracula. It's like we know all these characters.
00;36;11;21 - 00;36;44;13
And so we just, like, they don't spend any time being right. They wouldn't use dynamite so much. Fucking dynamite. Be fucking real. So where does he get all the dynamite? He wouldn't use it anyway. So it is funny that we were talking about this with Frankenstein's monster and kind of like this being a lot of kids from our generation's introduction of these monsters, I would say the same goes with Dracula, even though there are some similarities and like a lot of similarities to, you know, like it was his version of it, there are like little things, like, I could be wrong, but even I'm looking at a picture of him right now, like
00;36;44;13 - 00;37;06;17
the cowl, the his necklace when I dressed up as a Drac, as Edgar, as Dracula for Halloween. As a kid. This was the template that I was used to. I always had to have the little medallion and the collar and. And I don't think that's. I mean, I could Google this right now, but I can't. I if memory serves, that is not a Bela Lugosi thing.
00;37;06;20 - 00;37;25;18
He does have a caller. I was picturing him without it with the suit on. So he also has a he also has a pendant. Oh, okay. No. Daniel. Yeah. Last again. Well, this brings up another point that I'm going to make in a little bit. Like, I don't know if Sean in this movie has ever seen these fucking movies.
00;37;25;21 - 00;37;48;08
No, he's talking about Wolfman. And what does he say? Like he's not a regular guy. He doesn't, like, go to work and drive a car or something like that. It's like, yeah, he was a regular guy. Literally does like, maybe he doesn't drive because it's like olden times, but he actually said that. But he said something about like he said like, you know, him doing normal activities.
00;37;48;08 - 00;38;11;11
He's like like, dude. Yeah, he was you. Have you fuckin seen this? Sean is a little fucking prick. Oh, I have some thoughts about Sean. Sean is such an asshole. Yes. And you want to like him because he's the self-appointed leader. As the leader of this. Okay, okay. You know, if you have to say you're the leader, you're probably not that.
00;38;11;14 - 00;38;43;16
You just are the leader. But. Okay, we're we're still on our first reveal. Transylvania. There's a really fun matte painting as the. The people are running up to the castle, and you see it there. We'll say it. We've said it once. We'll say it again. Bring back Matt. Painting. Totally, totally. But okay. Yeah. Dracula. And then, right in this same kind of scene as our second reveal, Van Helsing, when he busts in to get the amulet and he, meets the the one vampire bride eating a possum.
00;38;43;16 - 00;39;05;12
Eating a fucking possum. But he sticks her real quick. And then, like this ground starts breaking out and skeletons, start coming up from the ground. That was kind of cool. It a portal got a portal. Got to have a portal. Got an amulet and. Fantastic. Got the amulet. Score in this movie is, chef's kiss. Remembering that that music is like.
00;39;05;12 - 00;39;29;12
That sounds like my childhood. Totally. Totally. Yeah. Just a mini version of it, though. This mini, is like. Like, you know, like when a character gets shrunk in a movie and they're like, hey, cock like this. That's what the music was like. So I remember it being like, meaning he did the what's the fucking movie talking about movies taped off TV on the VHS tapes.
00;39;29;14 - 00;39;41;07
We had one when we were a kid about monsters. It was about Dracula was played by Judd Hirsch. He played Dracula.
00;39;41;09 - 00;40;03;14
And, Judd Hirsch is. Judd Hirsch plays Dracula. Okay, Halloween. That almost wasn't the Halloween. That almost wasn't. And you know, you're talking about when voices get really small. He needs Dracula, needs to get under a door to the other side. Like, there's a, like, a witch or something has locked the door. And so someone says, oh, it's like Igor.
00;40;03;14 - 00;40;24;23
He's like, master, why don't you shrink yourself down to a tiny bat and crawl under the door? He's like, first of all, bats don't crawl. And Dracula, he starts getting really. He's shrinking into the bat and he's got to say teeny tiny bat, tiny bat, teeny tiny bat.
00;40;24;26 - 00;40;44;24
Dude, it's so funny. What is this movie? The Halloween that almost wasn't. So we watch that next chance familiar when Danny's talking about, the voices getting smaller. That's like that core. Core fucking memory. You can watch it on YouTube. There you go, guys. Maybe that's, Halloween. Then I'll put that into a triple feature next year.
00;40;44;26 - 00;41;09;14
Or a watch on, okay, that's fine, but we're going to keep moving on. Van Helsing, open the portal now. It's like 100 years later, and, we are in this undisclosed location. I don't know what town it is. Small town, USA, small town, USA with bullies and homophobia and just just the worst kind of people. Yeah, well you have.
00;41;09;14 - 00;41;29;03
Okay, so to kind of go off, there's that scene when we're introduced to our, our team leader, like the two, Sean and Patrick, they're being chewed out by their principal. Because they're, they're just they're more concerned with, you know, talking about and drawing monsters and paying attention. Spider with human and. Yeah, yeah, spider with human head.
00;41;29;03 - 00;41;50;13
And it made me laugh because the the principal has this line. Recess. Science is real. Monsters are not. So we're kind of establishing the fact that Sean and Patrick are anti-science and, they're pro like, yeah. And then and then right after that scene, he mentions there's a quarry. He's like, that guy was fully home going out and then uses the F word.
00;41;50;16 - 00;42;13;27
So we've established right out of the gate within maybe the first two minutes of these kids. They're anti-science and homophobic, and then they're following on the crusade that you mentioned earlier about these freedom fighters, kind of like trying to get rid of the others in our community. Yeah. So, yeah, I just wanted to I just is Monster Squad, MAGA.
00;42;14;00 - 00;42;38;06
Yeah. Is the question. And you like it, that's why. So yeah. And then you also under. Because I love them and I therefore. Mac. God. Yeah. Danny, I'm surprised you didn't wear your Stephen King Rules shirt today. I we shrunk. Oh, you've had it for 20 years, though. How did you shrink it? I don't know, but it's I think I just got bigger.
00;42;38;12 - 00;43;00;25
I cannot say not to be rude, but Cody wears it, though, and he's very proud of it. That's fun. Okay. Yeah, we were watching it the other day, and Cody's like, oh, my shirt. And I was like, my shirt. I feel like you just wore it like two weeks ago. Oh, no. Oh, God, I wish, but yeah, these kids are little dick holes.
00;43;00;25 - 00;43;22;20
And, you didn't like the kid in their fucking friend group, Horace, who people call him fat kid in the thick, like even his friends, quote unquote. Friends call him fat kid. And I'm like, dude, fuck these assholes. By the way, I think we should point out for, Brant, Callum or. Yeah. Who passed away.
00;43;22;20 - 00;43;47;01
He plays Horace. He died at only 22 years of age. In 97 from pneumonia. So. Yeah. Yeah. Just want to a little nod. We love you, Horace. Monster dude has one of the best lines in the fucking movie. Yeah, in the in the delivery. Oh, you mean what he just says? It's Horace. My name is Horace, and then you just go out.
00;43;47;03 - 00;44;07;25
So good, so fucking good after he kills a fucking. Well, again, universal with an asterisk. Monster. Yeah. My lawyer is, like, staring at me. Takes him down with a second shotgun. It is cool. Yeah. So our third reveal, the pilots meeting Dracula. I guess one pilot meets Dracula. The fucking plane. Did you notice the name on the plane?
00;44;07;28 - 00;44;26;13
No, the name of the. Whoever owns the plane is Browning Cargo. Reference to the Todd Browning, who directed the original Dracula 1930. I thought you were going to say that it's a Trump.
00;44;26;15 - 00;44;50;13
Guy just furthering the, the the manga. Yeah, above it all. Which wouldn't be that, like, far from, like, an inside joke, because he was like kind of a quote unquote in his prime in terms of, like, notoriety back in the 80s. Oh, yeah. Yeah, that was in the Coke was still hitting and he was actually firing on all cylinders.
00;44;50;15 - 00;45;08;24
But the one the pilot goes back and they hear some shuffling in the back and he goes, and there's a just a loose, there's a loose bat in the, in the cargo hold. It is great. Like they have that line or like, aren't these aren't the guys that were transporting dead. And then they hear the movement and it's a fan effect.
00;45;08;27 - 00;45;31;23
And then yeah, he goes back and the this is the bat with a human wiener. And he's very confused. I do have Dave is the first he sees as the shadow kind of like swinging. It's the iconic, like silhouette of a vampire bat. It's a giant cock singing Patreon. It might be porn before I can see it.
00;45;31;26 - 00;45;39;25
Then we cut back to the cockpit and the pilot's coming back to his wife and his wife and his lips.
00;45;39;27 - 00;45;52;15
Oh, but is it the Audi? That's like. I guess it depends the form. Well, if he's got a human wiener. Because if you do that. Yeah.
00;45;52;18 - 00;46;11;07
Because if you fuck, man, when he was a regular guy, it wouldn't be okay. Yeah, right. But what if he's Dracula? But what if he is a bat but has a human wiener? Oh, because his wiener doesn't transform back. Yeah. Does it weigh him down? No. They're very strong.
00;46;11;10 - 00;46;39;00
He uses his nuts as, like, a sail. No, no, but, like a flying squirrel. He's got some hangers on him. Oh, my God. So in Bram Stoker's Dracula, there is the scene where her name is escaping me, but not Mina. Who is it who has sex with Dracula when he's in the wolf? Oh, yeah, but he's kind of like a werewolf.
00;46;39;02 - 00;47;00;18
So then you wonder, is it kind of his bestiality, though? So, yeah. I I'll say yes. If you have sex with Dracula when he's a bat, it doesn't count as non bestiality. So that was a I just about way to say that it is because. Well that was my lawyer. He passed the note over to me.
00;47;00;18 - 00;47;26;02
He's like this is how to say it correctly. You know, it's not clear. It's to confuse everybody. No. Yeah. Yeah. Good. But yeah, there is I do have some questions. I first of all, I do love. I love in moments like this when kind of it establishes abilities. So we see him transform into the thing we set up the plot with, by hitting the cargo opening door.
00;47;26;04 - 00;47;48;10
Frankensteins, coffin gets or I guess box gets dropped out. So Dracula has to leave it like for some function I do. Was curious, trying to think now how to how to best form this question. Because the creature of the Black Lagoon and the mummy and the Wolfman. Oh, okay. Okay. Yeah. So all the monsters are in this town.
00;47;48;12 - 00;48;05;07
Dracula seems like this was. He was thwarted for a bit, but he is kind of dropped off exactly where he wants to be, right? Oh, maybe that's why he was moving around. Maybe he was like hey come here. You know like oh. And he kind of like he's like he positioned that this is my over the thing.
00;48;05;09 - 00;48;24;14
Yeah. Like this is me. Yeah. You open the door. Maybe he used my mind powers to be like open the door. Yeah. Can't Dracula do that? Like seduce you with his fucking eyes? Because touching that lemur.
00;48;24;17 - 00;48;45;02
Okay, so maybe that's what it was. Maybe. Okay. I always assumed he was a weird guy. Yeah, like a tree. Oh, a helicopter on a plane. Well, that's never been done. Okay, so the box dropped out. Dracula is like, I'm out of here. He lets the pilot live, and he goes down to get the box.
00;48;45;02 - 00;49;09;24
Yeah. Our fourth reveal. Now we've met, we've met the the kids in the monster squad, and we've met Sean's parents, Emily and Del. Del is a police officer, and, they're having, like, some marital problems because he keeps working and she's upset. And then they keep scheduling, couples therapy at night until workday, right after dinner.
00;49;10;02 - 00;49;27;06
And they're mad when they can't swing it. Like I have to go to work, and, like, this is why we can't make it work. Because you're always doing the thing that everyone does. He said you knew I don't know, like you signed up for it. Essentially. Yeah. Like you, I was a cop when you married me. And, fun fact.
00;49;27;09 - 00;49;55;29
Do you know what you were talking about? And, I apologize if I'm stepping on your toes. If you were going to mention this, there's a fun fact about their house where they live. Sean's family. Yeah, it is set, on the same lot across the street from Danny Glover's house. And Lethal Weapon. Oh, that's awesome, because I made a note later when the car pulls up to the front of the house and I was like, man, this neighborhood looks exactly like the neighborhood in Lethal Weapon.
00;49;56;01 - 00;50;24;18
That's funny. And it's the same jungle from predator just to bring it back. But also Emily, played by. Did it did the, the the mom got a weird name. Emily. Played by. Did did it as a mom. Mary Ellen Trainor, is also in Lethal Weapon. Oh, yeah. She's in every 80s movie. To be fair, she's in all the lethal weapons, know one, two, three, and four and the neighborhood they live in.
00;50;24;18 - 00;50;46;24
And even, you know, we'll talk about it now since we're talking about it. The dad, Dell and his partner, Sapper, have a very much a Riggs and Murtaugh dynamic. Oh, yeah. You know, even even just go on like the looking me a black guy and a white guy paired up as partners and then they're like they kind of have opposite personalities and it's very much a little sassy.
00;50;46;27 - 00;51;06;01
That's so funny. So anyways, I thought that was fun, but good catch. Yeah. Cool. Okay. Let's see, I will I do want to point out very quickly, because I had like a few things about Danny. If it's not about the fucking mummy, if you need to. Well, I had a note that they have the. I guess this is coming out.
00;51;06;01 - 00;51;29;18
This is coming after saw. Oh, no, I'm gonna say right now. So they do have the best house because not only do they live across from I always forget Danny Glover's name. Murtaugh, but his. Thank you, his roof has a clear shot of the drive in movie theater, and I guess he has somehow. Maybe his dad procured the, speakers from the.
00;51;29;18 - 00;51;46;23
Because they can hear it too. Well, it's when you when you go to the drive through you, you turn on the radio, drive and not the drive. Was that always the case? I thought that was good to make. You know, I think that's how it's been. Oh, well, I remember when we were kids, they still had, like, the speaker box that you would like.
00;51;46;25 - 00;52;04;17
Yeah. Put it in. But I think you could do like either maybe when we were kids and maybe they were like, okay, switching. Okay. But yeah, I did like tuned to some video station. Sean says the whole setup is that he's never seen this movie. He really wants to go. And then when his dad meets him, he's like, oh, this is the best part.
00;52;04;23 - 00;52;29;24
Yeah, I did, however, I think I have an answer to it because it's kind of like he's kind of comparing it. It's feels like this movie's version of maybe the Friday the 13th franchise or. Yeah, because they're already like on he mentioned something about part seven seven. Yeah. Oh, so so part 12 okay okay okay. So now so in this universe it would be the, the 2009 remake equivalent of it.
00;52;29;26 - 00;52;47;09
So he, he knows the story structure and he's like, he knows he's coming if you're. Yeah. But if you're familiar with the Friday the 13th movies, almost all of them start with a very lengthy recap. So my guess is when his dad came out, they're just watching the recap. Oh, this is the best part. But it's not of that movie.
00;52;47;09 - 00;53;12;05
It's just like in one of the earlier ones. It's the end of the 11th. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. It's fun. It's like fucking Silent Night, deadly night to where the first. It's just literally the. It's just more of that movie. It's the first movie. So wild. But okay. Number four, The mummy. Yeah. We set up that he's a cop.
00;53;12;05 - 00;53;32;10
He has to go to work to, investigate this robbery at this, break in at the museum, and, we find out that, the mummy, a 2000 year old dead guy, does get up and walk away. It's really kind of simple. We see him. It's a fun. It's a fun reveal because, like he says, 20 year old dead guys don't just get up and walk away.
00;53;32;10 - 00;53;58;24
And then it cuts to cut to the mummies kind of limping down the street like dragging his leg. And it's it's fun. Smashes right up against our fifth reveal, which is the Wolfman. This is our official reveal because he's turning into the Wolfman in this scene. There is a previous scene earlier where he says that he's, like, dangerous and he needs to be locked up in the in the, it's kind of like a, you know, they mentioned Rambo in this movie.
00;53;58;26 - 00;54;26;12
That's kind of like a very, like, First Blood kind of scene. Oh, yeah. Where he like, fights the cops and breaks out as a kind of. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The problem with that lock me up. We're trying. They were. They were trying to pull you up. Well you know what I think it was. He sees the moon and I think like they slam him down, he sees the moon and he probably got like a burst of energy.
00;54;26;14 - 00;54;44;20
You know what I mean. And just like and then fought him and then he said does that make sense? Even even before he saw the moon, he was screaming at them like they weren't doing anything. Yeah, yeah, he should he should do that call. And he just keeps fighting them. Yeah, well, I guess if he was calm, they wouldn't arrest.
00;54;44;20 - 00;55;01;16
Yeah, I don't know. Oh not necessarily I get it. This is like a chicken and egg or a werewolf. It's just like, do you tell them you want to be locked up first, or do you show them why you need to be locked up. Yeah. And therefore the chances of you being locked up are slimmer because you are now stronger than them.
00;55;01;18 - 00;55;30;19
Yeah. Oh I wonder what happens again there Wolf with Jack Nicholson and Michelle I think that's good. But our in our fifth reveal when we actually meet the Wolf man when he transforms in the ambulance. So cool. It's great. It's like the equivalent of Dracula's transformation from a bat in the beginning, where you just get little flashes of, like, things you are familiar with, with, you know, you get the nails coming out of the shoes and the skin is kind of bubbling.
00;55;30;19 - 00;55;51;03
It's transforming. There's so much squelching. Lot of squelching. More than you would normally kind of associate with a werewolf. Makes sense though. Your your your guts and stuff are moving all doing your skin's getting all weird. Yeah. Stretching out and then he pops up behind the driver like that's a cool visual where it's just, oh it's great.
00;55;51;08 - 00;56;17;00
You know, quick transformation and then bam! He just he's got a cool look. I like his look. It's fantastic. It's fun. Stan Winston, you did it again, you son of a bitch. Yeah. This is a year after Stan Winston won an Oscar for aliens. Oh, so I don't know. I do love that. Like, obviously a job is a job, but there's something about like doing this big budget creature movie that wins you an Oscar.
00;56;17;00 - 00;56;45;15
And then doing this really fun kind of romp with kids just feels. No, no. Yeah. Makes you love the guy even more. Yeah. There is a bit of foreshadowing when it comes to Wolf Man, and they've got, the the club not going to coma squad yet. So that's legit. They recruit. They recruit Rodney to come into I'm calling him Tina Burner.
00;56;45;17 - 00;56;59;08
They recruit him to. They know they're like this. Hey, hey, Horace says, hey, Rudy, help me out. Can we bring him in the in the club? And so they're asking him all these questions, and he says there are some, like, how do you kill a werewolf? And he's like, silver bullet. And they're like, how else are you like, that's it, silver bullet.
00;56;59;08 - 00;57;17;02
They're like, no, that's not it is. Okay, how else do you kill a werewolf? Then? And they list off all these things and they're like, but Sean says he falls out a window and he lands on a bomb, and that's like a fun. Never noticed that. Oh, really? It doesn't kill you just to know, but it happens later in the movie.
00;57;17;02 - 00;57;35;28
You know, he it falls out the window and explodes. Oh, yeah. And then. And then Rudy has the nice payoff of kind of saying, like, because he has a spoiler alert, kills the silver bullet, like, so. Yeah. And then there's like a Jason Goes to hell thing there, or is it all comes back together? Yeah. That scene scarred me.
00;57;36;00 - 00;57;43;25
He's like, scarred me. Yeah. I was like, they can just do that. Monsters can just not. Does.
00;57;43;27 - 00;58;05;15
Oh, I look right before our next reveal where Dracula and Gilman and Frankenstein and all of them kind of come together. This is awesome. Shot of Dracula standing over like a look out onto the town, and the lightning's, cracking, and he says, like, like, let it begin or something, like you're again, I get it. And there's a really fun.
00;58;05;18 - 00;58;26;00
He shakes his finger at the town. You just wait. Is you on there? I know you're going to hear it. But there's a really fun, like, blink and you'll miss it, like overlay of, his skeleton, his skull, like, as the lightning flashes. And it's pretty cool. I like that. That was the actor that was just, like, good timing, right?
00;58;26;02 - 00;59;00;15
Got it. So he's a fucking skeleton. Magic. But, yeah, like I just mentioned our sixth reveal. Gilman, Frankenstein, mummy, Wolfman and Dracula all kind of come together on this. On this swamp. And, you know, you they are also a monster squad. They are? I thought about that literally. Yeah. The squad of monsters. But, yeah, we were talking about this is this is also technically or not technically, but this is also our introduction to, the Gill man from the Black Lagoon.
00;59;00;18 - 00;59;21;07
And we I kind of briefly mentioned out Tom, we were talking about Tom Woodruff Jr, who did the effects, who worked on the painting and sculpting for this and for Frankensteins monster. And he played the creature. Apparently he had it of all the monsters had it the worst. He was basically not. No, not basically. Literally, like, sealed into that suit.
00;59;21;10 - 00;59;51;21
Pretty tired day. Couldn't go to the bathroom, couldn't eat, couldn't do anything. The only opening was these tiny little holes like dots in his eye that you could barely see through. And they said it was a nightmare. Jesus. Yeah. You can't tell me that. You couldn't have put a hole in that mouth for him to drink a smoothie or put a fucking catheter on his dick so that you could see, I agree, or a or a or a slightly bigger catheter up his butt so he could poop big old tube of his butt.
00;59;51;23 - 00;59;54;28
You know?
00;59;55;00 - 01;00;14;09
Imagine fucking tube. No, let's not bat penis with a catheter in it. So yeah, we can imagine that. Well, that they had the catheter for it and they they used their budget on that axis. His dick was so big. God, we are just, you know, we I always think I want to be classy. Like. Like who? What kind of person do I want to be on this planet?
01;00;14;09 - 01;00;39;25
What legacy do I want to leave behind? Definitely classy. Let's start there. You're with the wrong people. Yeah, and then I immediately just derail myself. It's fun. It's fun. Now, my question is, if it is Dracula with a bat dick, is it b c ality? No, but what's I guess I don't. I'm not as familiar with bat dicks.
01;00;39;25 - 01;01;00;03
I'm not either. But that's not tiny. That's like a will we see it later? Do you guys notice that I don't later in the movie, we see when, he gets staked and he's kind of half bat if you look and I. Oh well that's has like a weird little nub a little bit. So I actually said it in my, intro for this.
01;01;00;03 - 01;01;13;17
I said, Jack, it's got a bat dork. Yeah, it he has ever called a penis a dork before growing up. No, no, I didn't either. Gonna start doing it now, though.
01;01;13;20 - 01;01;37;27
I do love when Rudy asks her if she's ever been dirt. But. Okay. As I can tell that Casey is googling bat dicks. I'm trying to find the picture. I'm trying to find the picture. When he's turning, we can move on to, number seven reveal. This is, poor little Eugene in his bedroom with the mummy in the closet.
01;01;38;00 - 01;02;00;07
What a fun scene. You know, this might be the one scene that, like, when I. As a kid, when I remember this movie, it was this. Okay. Yeah. The dad comes in, and, so does total disregard for Eugene's feelings. Well, but also, this is this is the ideal balance of a horror comedy where it is kind of creepy, you know, like, they don't.
01;02;00;09 - 01;02;19;20
It's not like the mummies in there don't being silly. It's actually kind of spooky, especially if you're a kid watching it. Right. And the fact actually, the fact that the dad is playing it off as nothing almost makes it worse because you're like, wow, I'm so not safe. I'm fine. Yeah. My house with under the like the protection of my parents.
01;02;19;21 - 01;02;32;04
Yeah. This person who's supposed to protect me. Yeah, yeah. He's like, you're not sleeping with us tonight. So of fucking forget it.
01;02;32;07 - 01;02;55;29
So I'm not sure exactly this falls somewhere around here in the movie, but I'm not sure exactly where when Sean hears his parents fighting and the mom had given him Van Helsing diary that she found at, garage sale or something, and, there's a note on the, like, a dry erase board that says, says, like, so-and-so is interested in the book.
01;02;56;01 - 01;03;21;01
Whatever. He immediately decides that this person's name is a fucking. What's that, like a he needs to, like, decipher gram an anagram like, why is his first instinct to be like, that's what he's done. This with every name he's come across. This is just now just into it. He's so his friend. He meets Patrick for the first time.
01;03;21;01 - 01;03;41;21
He's like, hey, I'm Patrick. And he's like, he's like, trick to rip, check. Rip. Terrific opaque. I love tar picks. We're meant to be friends. But it's so funny that, like, not only does he try to decipher like the words and move them around, but it's just backwards. It's just straight up. It's also Dracula. What are you doing?
01;03;41;26 - 01;04;03;22
And notice. Yeah, when he finally writes it out, it's just the opposite. Anyways, that that was funny. Okay, so now they are establishing the monster squad. He calls all his friends together and he's like, hey, we're now a squad. They're like, what the fuck's the squad? Kind of like Miami Vice, he says. Kind of like the Claire, kind of like a Claire.
01;04;03;25 - 01;04;22;15
But we have roles now. Yeah. One of my favorite lines it's like, has nothing to do with monsters, but it's like they put their hands in, you know, to be like, okay, we're all in on this. And then the fucking dog puts this part and Rudy says, how does it dog get up here anyway? Look, I love that dude.
01;04;22;17 - 01;04;47;17
Oh, yeah. God, this is what I'm talking about. A ragtag group of a motley crew, as it were. Totally. That's the IMDb line. Molly Kim. Mostly children. Children. So, let's see, they go to see Scary German Guy, and we find out that the amulet is. Oh, sorry. Oh, no, no. Go ahead. The amulet is concentrated.
01;04;47;17 - 01;05;08;17
Good. And it wards off evil. But the balance between good and evil. If it shifts, it shifts. If it's destroyed, I should say, And then that opens up the portal that we saw. An opening that can swallow the forces of evil forever. But only every 100 years, at midnight on the certain day. And that's just markets. Yeah.
01;05;08;17 - 01;05;32;13
So happens to be tomorrow. Tomorrow night. What if you got it wrong and you're like, no, it's next month is like shit, like wrong. What if they got it wrong? And it was like daylight saving last. Like it was like last month. They missed it. Oh, and that's how the whole year. That's why they're all mega. Because, see, the fucking evil has taken over.
01;05;32;13 - 01;05;51;27
Set up a sitcom where these characters have to now, like the monsters and the Monster Squad, have to, like, coexist. They know that. They know the end's coming, but they see the monsters all year and they're like, oh shit, yeah, the monster that good. But it's funny. Yeah. Scary German guy. You know, I just mentioned his name, but he's like this.
01;05;52;00 - 01;06;09;17
If you haven't seen the movie, he's like this character that they're scared of. He's just a guy, but they think he's like a monster. But he's really just super sweet and all, you know, Germans. Well, that's the thing. Yeah. You establish later, he's like, they're like, wow, you know a lot about monsters. And he's like, now that you mention it.
01;06;09;17 - 01;06;29;01
And then you see he has the, what you might call it, it's got a tattoo. Yeah, from concentration camp. From a concentration camp? Yeah. I got, like, it's like a super dark moment in this kind of fun movie. It's like, oh, my God, you just want to eat pie, though. So yeah, he does go back at some fight.
01;06;29;04 - 01;06;31;16
I agree.
01;06;31;18 - 01;06;53;03
So let's see our eighth reveal. This is really quick, but it's, it's kind of important because it's a homage to an earlier movie. This is where Phoebe meets Frankenstein, and, you know, it's the little girl by the water, and Frankenstein battles into the water. Yeah. And you just see his. You just see his boots, and you kind of know it's that they're meeting, and,
01;06;53;05 - 01;07;20;11
And then he kills Phoebe again, because even that's her. It's her zombified corpse. That's. Yeah, she becomes part of the monsters. Yeah, yeah. So it's really quick. This is during the scene where the boys are meeting scary German guy, and then in our ninth reveal, she introduces Frankenstein to the boys, and they all freak out. Yeah. And we also get to know Tom Noonan in this, in his in his version of Frankenstein's monster.
01;07;20;11 - 01;07;50;03
And I just want to say, like, he's funny, he's heartbreak. He's such a committed character actor. Like, maybe one of the best. And it's not that Tom Noonan's underrated, but he is in a weird way. It's like he's not he's not the household name that he should be, right? But every time people, you've probably seen him in a movie and you've probably been enamored by him, and maybe didn't even know it, but, that scene when he's looking at the mask, the Halloween mask.
01;07;50;03 - 01;08;12;14
Oh, yeah, bring in science monster. And he's just like he says, like, scary. And it's. And then it cuts to them walking off into the sunset. Woo! Yeah. Nice little, rips my damn heart out. E.T.. It looks like E.T.. Like a shot from E.T., but very E.T.. Yes, but yeah, like so he has to. I remember when I agree with you, I totally agree.
01;08;12;14 - 01;08;33;12
Like, it's a it's a heart wrenching scene where it's like, you feel for him and whatever, but, like, he sees the mask. He has to know in order for that to work, he has to know that Halloween masks are used as scary things. Then he has to know that, like, so he's seen him. He's knows that that's him.
01;08;33;12 - 01;08;55;00
So he's seen himself in a mirror. Then he has to put those two together and be like, what if it was like, I'm saying anything? And he was like, they're making masks with me. He's like his question. He's like, sexy, sexy. And they're like, no, he starts autographing it for them. They're like, no, that's not what this is.
01;08;55;02 - 01;09;14;04
And then it's like it's intercut with like, you know, later in the montage when it's just like him and Phoebe in the clubhouse and he's like, got the boa around him and like the glasses and the hat on it, like, he's got pins, right? He's like, you guys see? Yeah. He says, dressing up. He's taking pictures of himself with the fucking camera.
01;09;14;07 - 01;09;47;04
And they're like, yeah, that's how grasp of the situation of the reality. This is all vanity. He's like, damn, I like this town. God. That's so fun. But yeah, no, like I, I say that jokingly that he has to put all those things together. But, it is a really good scene, and it's. Yeah, it's or it kind of sets up, you know, his like, humanity, which we get to at the end of the movie, which is just heartbreaking with him and CB and oh, so let's see, the boys just met Frankenstein.
01;09;47;07 - 01;10;12;22
We cut to Dracula and the Wolf Man looking in like the dungeon of this big house. The dungeon, like the basement or whatever you call it, cellars. And he's looking for the fucking amulet, and he sees it and he says, oh, like, here's the amulet. It's almost time, and nobody can stop me. And then it does a fun cut to Sean waking up, and it's like the getting ready montage, and it's got that one song and it's so cool.
01;10;12;28 - 01;10;37;14
They carve steaks and make silver bullets in shop class. Which is a nice reference to, a previous episode when I mentioned that I was a substitute teacher for a shop class and construction video and construction class and showed kids a video on how to build a dam. Yeah. Yeah, but why was. What? Poor Patrick, they are like fucking roof making.
01;10;37;14 - 01;11;02;23
Rudy's making steaks and bullets and stealing. Yeah, stealing bow and arrows and fucking tire pick is making business cards. Hey. Yeah, the business cards are like the. That's the creative one, you know, the design guy for is kind of implying, like, there may be more monsters on the road and we're going to capitalize on this. So yeah, just like they absolutely.
01;11;03;00 - 01;11;23;14
Yeah. These fucking MAGA kids who just like, can't the like they see a problem with, like, how can we like, benefit any of this fucking squad? It's pro MAGA. I can't believe it. We are all part of capitalism I agree, but they are like seizing it in a way that just feels wrong. No, they just want to take care of people.
01;11;23;17 - 01;11;46;24
Well, I can't picture it like they're getting ready and they're like, okay, Rudy, you go make the weapons. Sean. You go with fuck Sean. Dude, I don't know what the fuck Sean's doing, but it's like Sean's riding a bike. Patrick, make us some business cards. The city has quite literally done everything. He's making the bullets. He steals the bow and arrows.
01;11;46;26 - 01;12;05;24
I'm assuming from the school. Yeah. Sean I guess actually Sean is delegating but I like Rudy's character a lot. Yeah. Yeah Rudy is, is definitely Rudy does quite a bit of damage in the, in like the most constructive sense. But he kills most monsters. I like that he looks like a bully but he's not right.
01;12;05;26 - 01;12;27;20
Right. You know what I mean? Like when they set it up, like, he looks like the quintessential bully. That's always look like. Well, they usually say like, bullies are bullied. And when you think about his character, his goal is to become part of the squad with the so called kind of like nerds. And they're younger, so it's like, so maybe he needs this, like community.
01;12;27;26 - 01;12;49;09
Yeah. And then shows that in being part of this community, he can actually be the best version of himself. Oh, and he ends up saving the day. The end. Yeah. We all need to scared. Isn't that cute? We all need a squid, a monster squid. Okay, guys, Let's see. Oh, we're more than halfway there. We're on number ten right now.
01;12;49;14 - 01;13;04;23
Yeah, but number ten is Eugene meeting Gilman. So Eugene is, like, fucking off by the water where he shouldn't be. Know Gilman comes up and fucking eats his Twinkie.
01;13;04;26 - 01;13;28;13
Doesn't he say, like, creature stole my Twinkie. Creature stole my Twinkie? Poor Eugene, by the way. Like getting just terrified. Yeah, he's got the mummy in his closet. He can't go anywhere without a monster popping up, but, like, why? Like why didn't Gillman fucking, like, grab Eugene and, like, put him in the water and eat him because he wanted the Twinkie?
01;13;28;15 - 01;13;53;06
Oh, he'll. He's like he likes processed foods. Yeah. He's been living underwater eating. We can't open his mouth wide enough because they fucked up the costume, you know. Yeah. He's he's like, he's a giant. That actually wasn't in the in the script. That was the actor being like, oh, this happened to be recording.
01;13;53;09 - 01;14;22;19
Okay. Like a continuation of this scene. Our 11th reveal is the boys at the mansion, and they're at Shadow Brick Road and six six House Shadow Brick Road. Yes. This is where they meet Wolfman Dracula and some of Dracula's brides who, were just some girls in the closet until Dracula bit them. Sean, this is where he starts really giving me some mixed messages.
01;14;22;21 - 01;14;38;22
This is why I insist. Well, yeah, well, this really builds on it because he's, like, insisting that they don't call Frank a monster, but it's, like, quick to immediately, like, not help him. Yeah. It's like, fuck it. He's he's had he's like, he wants to die for us. And Frank's like, oh, it's just a door on me.
01;14;38;22 - 01;14;53;13
Like someone just moved the door. Yeah, I really wish, like at the end when Frankenstein comes back, you know, spoiler alert, the party, like, picks up Sean. He's like, you asshole. You just fucking left me there.
01;14;53;15 - 01;15;17;00
It's like an undercover boss situation. Yeah, yeah, this was a to really the leader topic was a better leader than you. All right. Oh, I guess Horus is in that. Horus. Eugene's the. I feel like Eugene would be the best leader. He's the most emotionally invested because he's been kind of just. Isn't he like Mr. Journey? Yeah, but his character journey, he's so, just defining.
01;15;17;00 - 01;15;40;05
Yeah, I guess I seen all the monsters, and he still stays with them. Yeah. And I think it's important to know when to ask for help. And he fucking writes a letter to the army. Yeah, yeah, he gets the army involved. He's also the one when, like, when Sean is like, no, let him die. Eugene's like he. But help him like he's like crying and but he doesn't leave aside.
01;15;40;07 - 01;16;08;12
Worth noting. Nope. Eugene's the MVP. The Army. But yeah, they meet Wolfman Dracula. This is the famous, kick him in the nerds scene. So fun. But, yeah, they, they get cornered by the monsters, and they do, like, a great scene, by the way, he even mentions, like, party boy literally coming down each corridor. And, he just people's the statue's hand and they fall down into the,
01;16;08;14 - 01;16;31;12
And then that cut. Guys, this movie's so good the way that it cuts right to the diner and like I don't know, it's just it's propulsive. It's lived in. There's these characters are kind of like all over the map. They're all like getting ready to, you know, they're were built, were crescendoing to this epic finale. And yeah, I would love to do a Fred Dekker double feature with this and night of the creeps book.
01;16;31;17 - 01;16;50;11
There would be some way that The Creeps has a little nod to Monster Squad in it, and one of the bathroom stalls is like the Monster Squad lives or something. Yeah, yeah, it's just it's like graffiti on one of the stalls. Yeah. That would be fun because, like, they've got a similar, like, vibe to them. DNA. DNA.
01;16;50;11 - 01;17;12;23
Yeah. Which is Fred Dekker. Yeah. Makes sense. Maybe it's the same people. So once they escape, they've got the amulet. They're running away from the house. We're on our 12th reveal, where the whole group now meets the mummy. And, this is a fun. See, this is always fun. So good. You know, you got this. Also, the mummy who's kind of like.
01;17;12;26 - 01;17;29;02
I don't know much about the mummy, I'll be honest. Yeah. And he's just kind of there, but he's, like, climbing on the back of the jeep, and it's very henchmen. Like, a lot of these monsters are more henchmen to Dracula than fully realized. You know, characters. And I don't mean that as, like, a slight against the writing.
01;17;29;02 - 01;17;47;02
It's just like, that's just what they are. Sure. Yeah. You know. Yeah. Aside from the Wolfman, I guess he's the one who even earlier he calls del, and he's like, he's the only one who can talk, but you can only talk about like when Dracula gives him the pills, he spits them out. So he has a moral code as when he's a human.
01;17;47;04 - 01;18;12;22
All right. But but what I mean is, like, he can speak, and I think that makes him more intelligent. Really? I mean, that's. Yeah. Like, Frankenstein is not intelligent. Clearly. Yeah. Gillman. Yeah. He just. He's a fucking fish. Mummy. Fish are stupid. The mummies they are. The mummy has been dead for 2000 years, and he's wrapped up in a bunch of cloth and barely talk and wear.
01;18;12;22 - 01;18;34;16
Can't talk and can barely move. So, Yeah. And I think in The Mummy, if memory serves the character of The mummy is actually like a bad person. So it's not like as, like movement is more it's like circumstance like. Yeah, he could be just Larry Talbot is also what other that first Larry Talbot he's a great guy.
01;18;34;19 - 01;18;56;18
Just a great dude until he gets bit by a wolf. I love how like Cassie's arch nemesis on our show is second layer. I know, it's so stupid. It's so stupid. I hate him so much when we do a, another if we do like a werewolf triple feature, I'm just going to do like, the next movie that it's just so we can, like, sneak off into whatever possible.
01;18;56;21 - 01;19;17;18
That's. It's horrible. But, yeah, this is fun with the mummy and Rudy. He, like, takes the the cloth. Rudy takes out, like, a lot of these fucking monsters. Oh, yeah. He kills the mummy, too. Yeah. See you later, bandaid breath. Yeah, that was a good impression. That was good. Thanks. Yeah, that was a lot of fun. You, Tina burner.
01;19;17;18 - 01;19;39;26
My lawyer's looking. He said two similar. We have to. We might have got a cut of that. Got a could get sued, for the design of the mummy. Again. This probably has a lot to do with the fact that this was, I mentioned, like, this formative movie for me as a kid. But all of these designs, especially The Mummy, feel like the quintessential design of these monsters, as sure as they are.
01;19;39;26 - 01;20;00;01
Yeah, because The Mummy is very simple design, but there's just like little details on this one that elevate it beyond even like the originals. I mean, even like the the 1990, the Stephen Sommers one is great, but it's very much like an effects movie. And this one obviously is kind of contained, you know, by its budget and restricted a little bit.
01;20;00;01 - 01;20;21;11
But I think to its benefit, I think it looks it just looks so good. Oh, totally. And when like he unwrapped and it's just his skull that's left. Like, where does our bones go? Did they, like, just turn to dust and, like, why didn't his skull turn to dust? But, like, I'm only thinking about that now as we talk about it.
01;20;21;11 - 01;20;38;22
When you're. When I'm talking about it, when you're watching it, you're like, oh, that's fun. Like his his his skull is there. Was it just the was where his clothes. The thing like his wraps. Just keeping him up, I guess. Yeah. And supporting his skull. But there's, like, a lot of dust, I think. So I think maybe his bones, like, turn to dust.
01;20;38;24 - 01;20;46;14
That's fair. Maybe he's moving so fast, unraveling so quickly that it's just like my bones.
01;20;46;17 - 01;21;11;22
He's like my bones, my bones. Oh, my God, my bones. That is just looking at it. Just like it's like mommy who, like, doesn't say anything. Whatever. But when he starts getting unwrapped, he's like, screaming in agony. And then later on, like, this fun little moment to be like, the kids are like, oh my gosh, should we hope this to kill?
01;21;11;24 - 01;21;30;24
It's like a five minute scene and screaming so upsetting. He like it's like and unravels and they like stop the car and they're like sitting there and he's like screaming and they're like cradling him as he's. He's like dying.
01;21;30;26 - 01;21;53;23
Scary German guy says, would you like some bite or is it just him feeding him until he ultimately dies? It's like cherry all over his face. Oh my God. Cut to my touch. It's like they just move on.
01;21;53;26 - 01;22;27;11
Him. It's part out for the mummy pouring out. Okay. Onto a, sad scene. Our 13th of the. Oh, yes, it's a dirk. Sapper and Emily meeting Dracula on the front lawn of, their house. You had Dracula fucking blows up Dell's partner, Sapper in the fucking car. So, but how come how come that his car goes through another car, but not through the pick events?
01;22;27;14 - 01;22;43;28
Well, it's, I didn't notice, you know, it's probably, you know, going back to our last episode, Frighteners. It's frighteners rules. So, like, you can decide when you want to. Well, he's not a fucking ghost. I don't know, he's fucking Dracula.
01;22;44;00 - 01;23;08;10
I don't, you can turn into a bat. Yeah, they turn to it. But that's like, from his big dick energy. Yeah. That's what transformative. Yeah. You know, I don't know that answer. I just, I just went with it. I don't, you know, it's a good question. I just don't, I don't know. Yeah. Yeah.
01;23;08;16 - 01;23;35;22
You know, actually, before we got to this, there was a fun, a really fun werewolf transformation in the phone booth when, you know, Dan, you mentioned the scene earlier, right after, he spits out the video and spits out the piece. It spits out the po speech, and, he spits out the pills, and then he runs to the phone booth and calls del on the phone, and he's he's going to kill your son and fun like, you know, the camera goes in front of the phone booth, and when it comes around, he's already starting to change.
01;23;35;22 - 01;23;56;13
And then that's really cool. And then he howls under the light. Yeah. It's so good. So good. Going with, like, foam coming out of his mouth. Really fun. But, yeah, Dracula blows out, blow blows out, he blows, Dracula blows out his pants.
01;23;56;15 - 01;24;01;18
Oops. So that garlic blows up earlier?
01;24;01;21 - 01;24;21;01
No, I like garlic. Lost Boys reference. Now we're on to, like, our final confrontation where it all kind of happens in the town square. They're, like, looking for the church so that they can say the German words with the amulet and save the day. And all the monsters are kind of like converging on this, to try this.
01;24;21;01 - 01;24;40;03
You've never seen this movie. Everything Zach just said sounds insane. They got to get to the church. It's the finale to get to say the words the German guy. And they got open up the thing with the with the with a version. With a version, version. A little Eugene's like a Shia version. Cute kid. But, this is our 14th reveal.
01;24;40;03 - 01;25;01;27
The vampire brides in the town square where Rudy, like, fucking steps up. I love it when he, like, pushes past them to go right towards him. Like, just headed for the problem. Going to solve it. I'm in the goddamn club, aren't I? Yeah. So good. Why didn't you say squad? Yeah. I'm like the damn clear banner.
01;25;01;28 - 01;25;26;17
Now I'm in the goddamn square again. I cleared squared, He pulls out his business card. He's like, hello, I'm a squared member. I'm a member of Two squared. You gotta get this stupid. Oh, they need badges. This is probably the scariest. The bride scared me. I think the most totally hit. Yeah, like there's something about them.
01;25;26;17 - 01;25;49;01
Yeah, yeah, there's something about their simple design. Yeah, well, because they're so. They're not menacing, which makes them more menacing. Yeah. No, I mean, yeah, it's like they're like. Yeah, they're, they're. Look, is so simple and just like, you know, pretty. Right? It's like a, like a long white flowy dress that's like their look isn't scary, but like, it's all in there.
01;25;49;05 - 01;26;08;07
All the aggressions in their face with their fangs and, Yeah, totally. I yeah, it is like the maybe that is it's just like the fact that they look very we know that they were innocent. And then when they do like the little Anna, like, guys showing their fangs with the blood, it's. But I love like the, you know, he shoots one and then he can't get the arrow out.
01;26;08;07 - 01;26;28;09
So the other one. Yes. And he's like doesn't move. He's just like scared. And it's just it's good. But, number 15, though, meeting the wolf man in front of Abbott and Costello, meet the Wolf Man. But tell me story. Don't miss the Wolf man with a stick. It like, got another fucking stick of dynamite. Oh my God.
01;26;28;11 - 01;26;35;26
Dynamite in the 80s is just. I'm surprised they weren't, like, really easy to come by, like nunchucks and.
01;26;35;29 - 01;27;09;11
But, yeah, he he, So he shoots bat. Sure. Bat bachelor. He shoots bat Dracula, and, really good shot, by the way, because he shot a flying bat. What? Fuck. A few times, a few times. And, so Dracula is now, like, in this warehouse, kind of like, half formed, and, Dell goes up to finish him off, but he's attacked by the Wolf Man, and then Sean's there, and they have, like, this fight, and then he sticks the fucking dynamite in his pants and pushes him out the window.
01;27;09;11 - 01;27;33;14
And very cool, very cool. Confrontation scene. And when we see the Wolf man kind of come, you know, because if we confirm that there are only a couple ways to kill a wolf man. And one of them isn't dynamite, we see the the limbs kind of coming together. They actually used remote controlled limbs on wheels that they would like, no shit so that they.
01;27;33;16 - 01;27;54;28
It's pretty cool. If you see the behind the scenes videos, it looks like little like race cars. Those werewolf limbs. Oh, that's fun. That's cool. Yeah, it's like a great scene because it's just like his torso is still together and he's, like, trying to put the pieces back together again. Sometimes simple as best, you know? Like having to, like, watch, maybe like a CGI, like him coming together.
01;27;54;28 - 01;28;12;25
Oh, yeah. It's like you kind of see the seams in this one. They kind of lean into it. It's like we know, I don't know. Yeah, less is more. Oh, totally. Not all the time. But let's see. We're getting to the end here. I mean, obviously it's end the movie, but number 16, the cops and Rudy meet the Wolf man.
01;28;12;28 - 01;28;34;19
Rudy again takes out another classic monster with the state. Never like really is he just saves everyone. He does everything. Yeah. Kills everyone. Yeah. He's the same way as to transfer it. Yeah. Sam, it's like the oldest kid in the group. And the youngest kid in the group do the most like Evie and Rudy are like, they the today.
01;28;34;21 - 01;29;01;04
And then Eugene, too. Yeah. Number 17. Great. Great scene. Horace versus the Gilman. Gilman comes out of the sewers, kills a couple of cops. Horses there with a shotgun. Forget. And you just, like, pick up the shotgun off the ground. But he just has it. Then you had it this whole time, and he's like, oh, yeah, the bully kids from the from the beginning of the movie who this are terrible to Horace.
01;29;01;07 - 01;29;21;03
They're in the store and Horace is like, let me in and they won't let him in. And then he fucking steps up and takes care of Gilman. And as his moment in the sun has is 15 minutes, that's one of the things, you know, we talk about things that we automatically think of when we think of Monster Squad, and that's one of them, is my name is Horace.
01;29;21;06 - 01;29;44;07
That's shotgun cocking. Yes, I said cocking. No, I wasn't laughing about that. I was laughing about the scene and how he says it and stuff. It's funny. It's so good. Our last official reveal is Dracula busting through a bunch of cops, just, like taking them down. And then he grabs Phoebe. Poor little Phoebe. She's so cute.
01;29;44;10 - 01;30;10;05
Like, she reminds me. And you know the story about. Oh, Go ahead. Sex daughter, by the way. Yes. Yeah. Do you guys know the story about this? When they were filming with the actress? She didn't know that the actor, made his name, right? So, I don't know, Duncan Krieger. She didn't know that he was going to do the whole, like, line.
01;30;10;05 - 01;30;31;26
And then, like, he set her. Oh, no. So her reaction is real. Oh, so. And he picks her up and even the screaming and everything, and it scared the shit out of her. So it's a really makes me sad. Yeah, it's pretty great though. It's a great line. It's a, it's what it talk about. Underrated actors. Good lord, he's so good in this I love them.
01;30;31;26 - 01;31;01;25
Yeah. It's good. Give me the amulet, you bitch. Yeah. So scary. German guy throws the amulet, right? Opens the portal. Then they just about. He just assumes it's in the book. It's like throw speak lines, throw amulet to open portal. Well, yeah, I was thinking it's like, this wasn't my point, but you bring up a good cause, like, he says that, like, Dracula is trying to shatter the amulet so that evil can reign.
01;31;01;27 - 01;31;24;09
And scary German guys just, like, just chucks it across the back in hopes that a portal opens up, like, no, no, no, no, no, this just shatters. And Dracula's like, oh, okay, that was easy. But my point was, they all just abandoned Phoebe behind that fucking little bench. Oh, yeah. Everybody goes to, like, the church in Phoebe's lair by yourself.
01;31;24;14 - 01;31;44;15
I notice that more this time. They just run in the opposite direction. Yeah, he's, like protecting Phoebe the whole time, and he's like, see ya. And, But, oh my God, every single time I watched that, this scene with her and Frankenstein and it's so heartbreaking and I cry every fucking like, don't go, don't go. And then she gives him scraps.
01;31;44;15 - 01;32;05;29
Yeah. Well, we're gonna move on. And then the. I do love that Frank gets to, have his moment again. Emily gets to. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Beat up Jack. Yeah. And the fucking army comes and, now they have a use for their business cards.
01;32;06;02 - 01;32;28;10
Fuck an army. What a great, like, needle drop, though, with the fucking hits for the monster squad. And then the fucking song comes in. Ding! So good. Ding ding ding ding ding ding, guys, that's the fucking monster squad did it. That's so good case. Like, yeah, it's finally over. I've. I've disliked movies a lot more. Tracy. Well, that's good.
01;32;28;12 - 01;32;50;15
Thank you. So would you. So this is not unlike the the bottom tier. Oh is this more mid. No. It's just it's fine. It's whatever. Okay. We learned a lot about it. Penises, movies that I regret watching. Penises. I'm like, man, I wish I wouldn't have spent two hours watching that. This isn't one I don't know. Okay, that makes me happy.
01;32;50;18 - 01;32;58;15
All right, well, now it's time to choose our favorite reveal in the Monster Squad.
01;32;58;17 - 01;33;25;23
Okay, 18 reveals speed round recap. I've got some, alternate titles, as I sometimes do. So here we go. Number one, Dracula, also known as. Where do you get those clothes? Batting deals. Oh, God. It was started off with a banger. It's like Bloomingdales, but he's a bat. Oh, God. Because he was a bat. And then he just, like, drops to the floor and he's fully dressed.
01;33;25;23 - 01;33;53;07
So I was like, now I get. Now you get it. Number two, Van Helsing meets the vampire and some skeletons, aka Hasty Helsing hunters. That's that's the Nightmare Village. That's the name of their their, their crew. Not terrible, but like the triple H. Like the triple H? Yeah, they're the Hasty Helsing hunters. Number three is the pilot meets Dracula.
01;33;53;10 - 01;34;05;05
But for this one, you have to pretend that I'm the pilot. Okay, I'm saying this as a pilot. Where'd you come from?
01;34;05;07 - 01;34;27;15
I know I've quit before, but, I think I'm gonna make it official right now. I don't even laugh. Why are you encouraging this? Number four. Number four. The mummy walks down the street. Also known as an all the I don't care. There's always one. But you left in the middle of the, So this is one I can, I can, I can reign it in.
01;34;27;18 - 01;34;38;04
And all the ladies say I'm pretty spry for a dead guy. I was proud of that one. I'll give you that. That's pretty good.
01;34;38;07 - 01;35;16;13
That one's pretty good. Number five, the wolf man, comes to life in the ambulance. Also known as this film doesn't get enough credit for featuring an homage to the original Wolf for this film. Doesn't get enough credit for featuring an homage to the original Wolf Man transformation scene from 1941. You see, in the original film, the transformation was a series of cross dissolves of Larry Talbot's feet as they grew more and more hair and turned into wolf paths in this film, The Monster Squad, Fred Dekker chooses to show the man's hairy knuckles as the camera dollies across the gurney to land on the shot of the man's wolf paws, ripping through the shoes.
01;35;16;15 - 01;35;40;15
Because that's not my favorite. You didn't mention this entire conversation because you need to save it for this. Oh wait, like an interesting talking point. You're like, no, no, no, there's a review. You got a way to say it. Number six, Gilman, Frankenstein and the whole gang, also known as Universals Unite. It's like Avengers Assemble staring at me right now.
01;35;40;17 - 01;36;09;22
It's like, please don't mention universal number seven. Eugene sees the mummy in his closet. AKA parents just don't understand. Number eight Phoebe meets Frankenstein, also known as another long winded paragraph about how this scene is an homage to the original Frankenstein film. In 1931. It's number nine The Boys Meet Frankenstein, also known.
01;36;09;25 - 01;36;29;10
Number nine The Boys meet Frankenstein, also known as Bunch of Pussies. They all fucking run away and hide. Number ten Eugene meets Gilman, also known as Gilman. Loves saggy twinks.
01;36;29;13 - 01;36;57;12
Wait, wait, did you. Did you write this after we discussed what a twink was or. Yeah. Okay. Number 11, the boys meet Wolfman Dracula and his brides, also known as. I mean, this is a given. Wolfman Scott notes. That's the classic number 12. The group meets The Mummy, aka Band Aid, breath and Booger Lips. Yo, you know why, booger lips?
01;36;57;13 - 01;37;23;23
Because. Because that scene always reminds me of earnest, scared, stupid where there's, like, a thing with the goblin on the back of the truck, and then he calls him booger, like, what a reference. You know, jokes are always better when you need to explain them. Oh, yeah. Now it's. Oh, now I'm laughing. Number 13, del Sapper and Emily meet Dracula, also known as Vlad the Impaler.
01;37;23;27 - 01;37;40;01
More like Vlad the Exploder, because where does he get all the fucking dynamite? Number 14, the vampire brides in the town square, aka. I mean, you know what? You could have said? You could have said TNT. We know Dracula.
01;37;40;03 - 01;37;45;25
So TNT, we know drama because it's like,
01;37;45;28 - 01;37;51;03
Jokes are good when you have to explain them. Yeah.
01;37;51;06 - 01;38;14;19
We'll see. Okay. 14 is the vampire brides in the town square, also known as I'm in the goddamn club. Nine 15 del meets the Wolf Man, also known as. Seriously, where the hell is everyone getting all this dynamite? 16 the cops and Rudy meet the Wolf Man, also known as an American Werewolf in America. 17.
01;38;14;22 - 01;38;42;04
Or is And some cops meet Gillman, also known as my name is Horace and 18 is especially fitting now that you've told me this, this anecdote about the little actress not knowing that Dracula was going to do that thing and starter, Phoebe meets the meets Dracula, also known as Phoebe, gets traumatized for life. You know, I wrote that before knowing that that actually is what happened.
01;38;42;06 - 01;39;13;20
It's funny. All right, now you need to pick your favorite reveals in Monster Squad using only the alternate titles. So this is really tough for me because I really do believe that all of these, especially talking about them, they're all just so fucking good. So what I'm going to do is I'm just going to pick the one that kind of has the most like emotional pull for me in that it's like the most nostalgic and it's what is it.
01;39;13;20 - 01;39;43;14
Parents just don't get it. Understand parents just and understand parents just don't know because he never heard the song. Guess not. What song? It's, Will Smith and DJ Jazzy Jeff song. I'm just a kid. And my fears and nightmares. That's much different. Much different. The parents just don't understand. Yeah. The scene with Eugene seeing the mommy in the closet, I feel like, is such a great representation of the tone of this movie.
01;39;43;16 - 01;40;04;14
And then when you pair that with the fact that I have this, like, that's like the core memory of this movie, it just feels special, right? He was also in the closet. Yeah. Oh, yeah. There's also some gay undertones. Also, Eugene is the name of the man who got me into watching horror movies in general. You're old babysitter.
01;40;04;14 - 01;40;25;07
That just came to me. Yeah, so that just came to me. So, yeah. Best scene. That's my favorite. Okay, Casey, what do you got for not caring about this movie? What was one that, like, jumped out to you? Yeah. So it's going to seem probably silly, but it was the it was the Vlad the Impaler. More like that.
01;40;25;09 - 01;40;50;09
Vlad the floater. Specifically because I just liked it when they showed his shadow turn into a bat. Oh, yeah. I mean, it's pretty iconic. Yeah, yeah, that was good. You see the shadow shadow doing hanging? Yep. Swinging. I love a good shadow. Don't you see as it flies away. He's like hitting things like a mailbox. I like it boom boom boom boom.
01;40;50;11 - 01;41;18;28
Hits on the top of the head. Being stuck on it. Yeah, it does. He grabs on to it. He flies away like a fucking like Mary Poppins. Yeah, yeah. That's right. That's good. Yeah. Danny, like you said, there's so many good ones in this movie that it's hard to pick, but I think I might just go, you know, it kind of, encapsulates the whole setup of this movie.
01;41;19;05 - 01;41;40;29
It's, you know, your lawyer might get pissed to me, but it's universals unite where it's the whole gang in front of him banging his fist on the desk. Right now, it's, you know, they're at the swamp, and they just woke up Frankenstein and Wolf Man starts to howl and Gillman is screaming, and the mummy's just mumbling, and, the lightning's cracking, and it just the camera pulls out.
01;41;40;29 - 01;42;02;11
It's really cool. I'm glad someone chose that one, because that is truly like the iconic moment. Yeah, it's such a cool image. And like the Avengers Assemble scene. Danny that's why I called it Universals Unite. Oh said that Danny was a he doesn't listen to me I just I do I was just laughing I think sorry. All right.
01;42;02;11 - 01;42;11;14
Yeah. No no that's that's good. All right now it's time for a segment that we like to call the real monster.
01;42;11;16 - 01;42;32;12
Casey, let's start with you. I feel like you might have quite a few. No, I only have two. Oh, okay. Oh, one of them is, The first one is unrealistic expectations of, treehouses, for instance, because I didn't have a fucking treehouse. And you know how bad I wanted a fucking treehouse. Yeah, yeah. What? A treehouse.
01;42;32;12 - 01;42;52;05
So fucking bad. And this one was really cool. Yeah, yeah. My neighbor had a treehouse, but it was just like, it's just like a floor with like a railing. It was like this. Hey, hey, hey. Better than mine. That's. I mean, yeah, I shouldn't complain when it was just a tree, right? Yeah. I was thinking about how poor I was.
01;42;52;09 - 01;43;19;28
You know, my. No, my friend, I was friends with a girl named Kayla. She was like, to a year or two older than me. She had a treehouse. She had a bitchin fucking treehouse. Oh, yeah, but did you take a shit like her parents put a shed in the trees? Yeah. My second one is Patrick. Because at the end I went to pick because at the end, when Lisa is reading from that book, you won't shut the fuck up, dude.
01;43;20;01 - 01;43;44;15
You want her read? Shut up. He's just in her ear going, whoop, whoop. You know, we can, we can. And I would I wanted to hit him so hard as brothers and sisters, but I don't if this is a big deal. You know, there's stories here and you're trying to save the fucking world. Yeah. Topic. You're the one in the club that recruited this girl to read the book.
01;43;44;15 - 01;44;03;19
Like, no, you need to do it and you can't shut your fucking mouth. I think now is the time to reveal. When I was a kid, obviously I didn't want to reveal this at the time, but I had a big crush on Tara Pick. Okay, okay. But I always think looking back is so funny because it's like this thing that I could, you know, everyone usually is like, yo, she's so hot, bro.
01;44;03;19 - 01;44;30;22
Like, and I'm like, this is so stupid. Like coming in with all this. Did you want to go next with your real monsters? Sure. Yeah, I have a few. I feel like I can probably consolidate some of them. Okay. First one I've got is homophobic, anti-science vigilantes. Okay? We don't need them. No, I also have Sean for being sexist.
01;44;30;25 - 01;44;53;01
I don't remember what. He's such a fucking asshole because he is, the bully for taking the biggest bite out of that Snickers bar after he steps on it. Like no one said to do that, he just said, take a bite. And then he could have just been like, nibbled. He's like, he shoves he deep throat stickers.
01;44;53;04 - 01;45;19;28
Yeah. Sean's dad for saying it's only a movie. Sean saying, go fuck yourself. Though it's never they'll get mushroom stamped by Dracula. Bad dick, mushroom step by Dracula's bat dick. Yeah. I wrote Sean's parents for planning a couples therapy session on a work day right after dinner. Just feels like you're asking for, like, an issue to arise, you know?
01;45;19;28 - 01;45;37;17
Don't blame the victim for it, Annie. But, like, when I have a question. Because I was curious when you brought this up before. Like, if it when would they schedule it? Like during the day they're working. I'm being facetious. It just it's. I don't want to know. I want to know what your thought process is coming from. It's just such an inconvenient thing.
01;45;37;21 - 01;45;57;10
Yeah, but when you're falling asleep to the to the president. No. That's fair, I don't know, I just found it funny that they're like. Yeah, she's like, setting the table for dinner. He's got work to do. And they're like. They're like finding excuses to be mad at each other, right? Like it's like, what? What did you think was that's why they need to go to therapy.
01;45;57;12 - 01;46;15;01
I know you also. Did you also notice that when Dell busts in the house later to call Sean on the walkie talkie, you see, Emily has her bags packed by the door. Oh, wow. Yeah. In the background by this is the mall. By the staircase. She has all her suitcase. So she leaving her children? Yeah. Yeah, I thought about that.
01;46;15;01 - 01;46;37;11
Was like, what the fuck? Interesting. Why? That, you know, she wasn't going to take the kids. It's true. The camera cuts to their bags completely not packed just to establish. And then I just have, I mean, I mentioned this earlier, but, Sean, for telling Frank to can it earlier. Oh, yeah. Like, fuck off, Sean. Fuck off.
01;46;37;15 - 01;46;58;11
He's not doing anything wrong. He's just like, talking. And he's a can it, Frank. It's like, well yeah, you can it. And it's like you, it's, you know, you speaking, you supposedly love all these fucking monster movies. Yeah. You have a fucking club. And then when you meet one, you tell them to shut up, leave him to die, tell him he would have.
01;46;58;17 - 01;47;18;24
It's just horrible. Doesn't even know his name. Now I am going to use this against him. It's Frankenstein's monster, you asshole. Got the hands down. Sean is the real monster of this fucking. Yeah, yeah. I have like, four of mine are just him. Let's see, I've got. Oh is that it? Danny, do you have any more?
01;47;18;27 - 01;47;46;04
That's all. Okay. I've got Nazis, you know, scary German guy. We revealed that he was, had to deal with them at some point in his life. I've got Rudy for being a peeping Tom. Kind of gross. On the subject of Rudy, I have Rudy's loafers because, like, his outfit's really cool, but then he's got fucking brown little penny loafers, and it's like, what the fuck, penny pennies in them?
01;47;46;07 - 01;48;12;06
I've got the problematic language, you know what I mean? You know what I mean? I've got bullies and friends, quote unquote, friends who are also bullies to their other friends. And, finally, I have Emily for endangering the lives of her children by letting her daughter sleep next to an open flame and telling her that that's what will solve all of her problems.
01;48;12;06 - 01;48;32;17
And when it blows out, like, shit's going to hit the fan. Yeah, the candle is going to keep the monsters away. But, yeah. You don't fucking leave an open fucking flame like a burning candle next to your toddler's fucking, I don't know. It's sad that the answer to all of our real monsters was it was the 80s.
01;48;32;20 - 01;48;57;18
Yeah, yeah. Like literally, it was the era in the 80s. All right, well, now it's time for our last segment. Would you survive the Monster Squad? I'm living through this mess. Yeah, I'm coming out. A warrior and a hero. Yeah. I mean, if we would survive Mega. Yeah, I think you know, hopefully we're going to survive.
01;48;57;18 - 01;49;17;17
Mega. I don't know, we'll see. Well, hope is the best of thing. Hope is that. Would you would you survive the best things? Dracula? Yeah. I don't know, like, you know, you think about like, his the brides and like, you know, that scene where Rudy's shooting them in the street and and there was endless supply of dynamite? Yeah, that's the thing.
01;49;17;17 - 01;49;34;23
We think we're going to go by, like, getting bit, but I think we just got to blow up. Yeah, yeah. What are these. So at one point someone's going to not time that wick properly. Yeah. Someone's something's going to happen whether intentional or not. Like he goes to pick up the dynamite to put it in fucking Wolf man's pants.
01;49;34;23 - 01;49;57;24
And it's like it blows up right when he picks it up. Oh, shit. Dough and Sean's body parts spray out all over the fucking, and the camera holds on them, waiting for them to, like, reconnect. But they never do. Wolf man goes up and, like, pokes at an arm. Is like a paw. It's like thing like a little dog.
01;49;57;27 - 01;50;21;00
Oh, good. So yeah, I mean, I think I would survive against some of the monsters, but not all of them. Definitely the mummy. Maybe not Dracula, probably not the wolves, man. I know that if I was in that situation with them coming down the hallway, I wouldn't think to fucking pull on the fucking statue. No, there's no fucking way.
01;50;21;03 - 01;50;44;05
Yeah, there's an alternate movie where the statue does, in fact not move and they just die and they have to fucking. They just, like, cower down on the floor and, like, get into a ball and just hope that they go like, it's not really happening. It's not really happening as like a teeth or like from all ends or just because their flesh look.
01;50;44;08 - 01;51;11;05
All right. Well, you guys, that's the Monster Squad. That is the second movie in our in declared. We are monsters. Terrible feature. Coming up next, you guys. Nightmare on Elm Street three Dream Warriors. It is our first time meeting Freddy in four plus years, and, it's going to be a lot of fun because that is a great entry in the Nightmare on Elm Street franchise.
01;51;11;07 - 01;51;30;12
So is it two? Is it a spoiler to say it's my favorite? I just said it. You just. I mean, you just said it, so you just said it. Yeah, it's almost my favorite. Okay. Do you have a favorite? Number one. Number one. Okay, okay. Yeah. It's just a very it's a very close second. Yeah. Yeah.
01;51;30;12 - 01;51;47;14
It's either 1 or 7. Seven. Okay. You know, I used to watch, I mean, I watched like, that was my go to franchise when I was a kid, so I can't even say how many times I watched all of them. But because I was gonna say I watched six a lot. I watched Freddy's Dead a lot.
01;51;47;17 - 01;52;09;21
But then I also watched part four, lot five. Yeah, there's it's funny. It's so good. Speaking of it being your go to series, it's the it was the only one that I had seen. All of them. Oh, really? Okay. Yeah, I when I was a kid, I didn't watch all of the Friday the 13th movies or all of the Halloween movies or all like any franchise other than they ran.
01;52;09;21 - 01;52;32;13
Okay, okay. Oh, interesting. Yeah. Well, that's going to be a fun, fun conversation. I'm excited to, to meet Freddy again. Very excited. And, talking about dream warriors. So make sure you don't miss that. Make sure to follow us on social media, Instagram, TikTok, Facebook. So you stay up to date on all the, the, fun updates and watch alongs and things like that.
01;52;32;16 - 01;52;57;14
Where can our listeners find you guys on social media? I am on Instagram at Wolf Mother Casey. Awesome. Danny. You can find me on Instagram, blue Sky and Letterboxd at my name. Danny Slim is Danny Salemi. That's two memes. Like the candy melt in your butt, not in your hands. Wonderful. And you can find me on social media at Zach when sick, make sure to join us for Dream Warriors.
01;52;57;14 - 01;53;00;26
And until then, thank you all for listening. Now go meet some monsters.